A Simple Hi...

Once upon a time,

I was lost in the crowd of words.

Lost and confused,

I tried to grab onto one of those voices,

Voices that speak so kindly and truthfully


Once upon a time,

I wasn't a part of any voice that speaks of my words

words that speaks of who I'm.

In search, I found those voices,

and one of them is you.


And once upon a time, I said a simple hi,

a simple word......that connects me to all.



Again a simple hi to you..... because I miss you.



ron

Change!!!! what the hell.....

Change, who actually wants to change? Me???. Been fooling myself for years, been telling myself that I should change to make my life better and eventually be happy. What a LOSER!!!!, why the hell did I do to make myself suffer in such an inconvenient emotion of CHANGING.

You know what I need?.....LOVE. I need to learn to love myself more, I should let myself be more conscious of what I want, not what other people want from me and what they want me to be.

I tried so hard to change who I'm and let others see me as they are, but I'm not them, I'm Buroy, I'm simply Buroy. A friend to some and an annoying persona to others, yeah, others, why should I be bothered by those insignificant others who doesn't even care who I'm.

So, the hell with change, I wrote a thought years ago about not changing, but being the foolish me, I didn't follow my first instinct. That is not to change, instead I'm replacing CHANGE to LOVE. I need to love myself more before I can share this love to others.

Series of Thoughts..Entry No. 3

Through my entire life, lots of things happened, things that I may not be proud of, but still, it happens. Some would say, that this sort of things are taboo, some would say that its just a part of life, or worst, that its just how we are, we experienced or tried to experience it in so many different levels. So many different levels that some actually abused it, made it so dirty that it becomes a stigma to the so called normal people, that GAY People = Aids, or Gay people + Men = Sin, only in the name of SEX.

At a young age I wonder about it and experienced it. So, the questions comes........



Entry NO. 3. 01 March 2001



S E X .......................




B A W A L K A N G A B A ? . . . . . .

ang alen?. . . .


masarap daw yun?......
kailan puwede.?.........
saan tayo?................
ano?........ ano na.....???


H O Y ! ! ! ? ! ?

ikaw nga!!!!.......


HAVE YOU EXPERIENCED IT?......

WITH WHO...???....

WHEN????

IS IT GOOD????.....

ARE YOU GOING TO DO IT AGAIN?.....

ARE WE?


ano ba yun?
wag...... wag??
masama daw yun para sa atin...
.....bawal...

bakit!?!?!...para sa kanila lang daw yun...
.....sabi nila....

kasalanan....
hmmm..kailan tama?


KAILAN TAMA ANG MALI?

TATAMA ba ANG MALI?


S E X..........MALI????.......HINDI....MASARAP EH....ISA PA NGA.




puroy.



So, how do you see sex in your life? or better yet, how well did you cope with sex in your lifetime?. Specially in our lives, we are always on the scandalous side of the story if the general public or the so called normal people talks about our sex life, its either YIKES!!!, eeek, or YUCK!! right? if they started talking about it. But who cares, masarap noh.

And shouldn't it be not just Gay Sex? or just S E X ?. Its nice to experience it with love, with eye contact, with feelings and at the end you can sigh with relief that you had it with someone good, may not be special but good and not sigh of relieved that its over and go.

Series of Thoughts..Entry No. 2

As days goes by, from my first entry to my first "Black Book ", it was literally black, I found it at a small book store in Cubao, Mirriam ata yun, or sounded like it, teka sa National bookstore ata, ay ewan, basta it was black and i need a white inked pen or anything opaque for it....Ok, I felt the ease of mind in writing whats in my heart, like questioned I always asked myself, but couldn't ask anyone, so, I wrote it down, corny???..yeah, pero kebs, Black Book ko to noh


Entry No.2. 16 February 2001

LOVE....


DO WE ALL FALL IN LOVE???????

But what is love???

Who is it for???

1. When do you feel love?
2. When do you find it?
3. When can I find it????????


Does it have a gender?........................Does it have a color?.........................................Does it exist for limited type of people?................................



M E R O N B A P A R A S A A K I N ?????


hmmmmmm....
bukas ba?
sa makalawa?
m a l a y o p a ?
ang tagal naman........ ayoko na ata...


MERON BA PARA SA AKIN??......talaga?..


sigurado ka?.....................SANA.



puroy.



As you can see the date, I was deeply affected by the festivities of the season, the season of love and sharing love. Seeing and joining my friends with their lovers and trying to enjoy every fiesta of red colored scenario everywhere, I too indulged with smiling face, but, with my eyes shut closed for the pains and confusion in my heart, weather I should be there or not. Making a fool of no one but myself that I'm happy and enjoying it.

But all of this was long time ago...Manhid na po, learned to enjoy what I have and who I have it with.

Series of Thoughts..Entry No. 1

I scribbled a number of thoughts years ago, eight years to be exact, but an entry from one of the members (MMG for Friends) actually makes me realized that, I too have been there, the letting go phase and with all those questions that I longed to be answered. But still, I think I haven't found them, the answers..... it still eludes me.

So, here it goes.

Entry No.1. 10 February 2001

A letter to an "A" Friend.


When you can't put your prayer
into words, God hears your heart......

I don't understand why God created
"People Like Us".

I shouted a BIG Why???.....
well who knows...

....I may not be Gods greatest creation
but i know that he loves you and me.


....And there are few things I treasure in
life and one of them is you.

....Basta ang alam ko dito sa mundo ko
na mundo mo, isa lang ang tanging
asam ko, ang maging isang tapat
na kaibigan mo.

At ngayon at bukas, buo ang tiwala ng
taong ito sa isang tulad mo.


puroy.


I wrote this for a friend, who I never thought of becoming my best friend, but the only bad thing about this was, I never showed him, he never saw this ever....again, a big why?.... I felt short of confidence in letting him know of how important he is to me. Until I left for my first job abroad and then he got into a relationship.... Then I felt it is more inappropriate to give such letter.

But we are still good friends, great friends actually with his lover for seven years.

wow again....

the last post was june 2008 after 9 months of forgetting this little project still the numbers are growing and growing....hmmmm, now i have to do something at nakakahiya naman sa aking mga readers, and i'm rest-assured na may reader ako...from 700 plus to 1000 plus hmmp....salamat po sa inyong mga bisita na kahit na bwisit na kayo dahil walang entry still you stop by to check...



konting photo po of me dito sa bahrain.....





bored sa office no.1



bored pa rin po.....




yan mukhang bored na talaga.....





flower i got last valentines day....from who...hmmm secret....






bored sa office......oo bored pa rin yan...






bora!!!!! having dinner.....yeah right bora daw...hahaha..bakit sa resto di sa beach...
well my bora body is not there yet.....

WOW!!!!!!

WOW...ISIPIN MO NAKALIMUTAN KO NANG MAG POST NG MAG POST NG POST AND STILL MAYROON PARING DUMADAAN DITO AT SUMISILIP!!!!! WOW ULIT... THE LAST TIME I CHECKED IN NASA 300 PLUS PA LANG YUN....NOW 714 NA!!!! ILANG BESES KAYA MAG PABALIK BALIK YUNG APAT NA READER KO TO REACH THAT NUMBER....HMMMM, I CANT DO THE MATH KASI DRAWING ANG MAJOR KO NOH.........KAYA KAYO NA LANG..PLEASE.

KAYA SORRY PO...I'M IN A VERY BAD MOOD FOR THE PAST FEW WEEKS...SALAMAT NA LANG SA MGA NAG RESPONSE SA AKING MUNTING KABALIWAN SA CHAT AT MGA EMAILS NA KINALAT AT SUMAGOT SILA NG MAGAGANDANG ADVISE PARA DI AKO MABALIW SA LUNGKOT AT PAGOD....YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE...SO SALAMAT PO!!!!

AND ALSO SA ISANG MOVIE NA TALAGA NA MANG NATULUYAN AKONG MABALIW SA KATATAWA..... ANG "MANAY PO 2 OVERLOAD" KALOKA TALAGA....NA RELEASE ANG TENSION SA AKING UTAK AND MADE ME REFRESH MY MIND ON WHO I'M AND WHAT I'M CAPABLE OF DOING!!!!! HA HA HA HA HA, MA INSPIRED BA SA ISANG KABAKLANG MOVIE....HA HA HA HA HA HA HA....DA VAH BALIW NGA....

KAYA, ISASALI KO SYA SA AKING UP COMING PPP..

BUT STILL, SIS, I WILL BUY THAT SHOES...SOME KINDA COW BOY SHOES...KAHIT SUMMER AT MASUSUNOG ANG MGA INGROWN KO SA INIT, BUY KO PA RIN SYA...MID YEAR SALE NAMAN EH....


BYE FOR NOW!!! AND BUY KO SYA TOMMOROW.....HA HA HA HA

my second day at the gym!!!!!

hmmmm, would you believed that, i actually enrolled at firstnest first plus here in Bahrain at the newly opened world trade center, my gulay i couldnt believed how much we need to spend and endure just to looooooooook gooooooooooood.

my gulay again, the member ship, the time you need to spend..and the worst the food you need to forget so everything will not go to waste....hay naku...now I'm sweating liked a pig just having 25 min at the treadmill, 60 crunches for the abs and 8 mins at that machine, i don't k now what they call it, but it looked like your skiing....anyways, i do feel good, after sweating, even my undies is soak in sweat...

but the best best part!!!!!!! well you guys know for sure....ok heres the deal ..just spend two hours here and i can assure you you will have a sprain neck just by watching all the eye candy around...


and I'm writing this post here at the gym....free internet, coffee, pool ....hmmm cute..


bye for now,